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Comedian Jill Bryan on Twitter
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If my kids have learned anything, it's that talking in a baby voice will get you burned with a lit cigarette.
Updated 28 seconds ago
Comedian Rob Heeney on Twitter
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Ha ha... That's THREE people who have told me (#muse) it's the best performance all year at the Emirates #arsenal @MickTheGooner
Updated 32 seconds ago
Comedian Samm Levine on Twitter
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The noises I make during a workout are indistinguishable from the noises the 28 Days Later "infected" make. #TryingToGetDownToMyZombieWeight
Updated 45 seconds ago
Comedian Jamille Harley on Twitter
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@roywoodjr lolol word up. I started back in 04 where you could only get up twice a month at crackers comedy club in Indiana.
Updated 55 seconds ago
Comedian Andrew Healan on Twitter
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used to be into white water rafting and rock climbing. Now I get those same thrills by riding public transportation while black out drunk.
Updated 3 minutes ago
Comedian Amy Schumer on Twitter
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@wilsylvince hey are you still in australia?
Updated 4 minutes ago
Comedian Jay Hollingsworth on Twitter
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Having never seen before, I'm now plowing through all episodes of Arrested Development. I now get what everyone has been talking about.
Updated 4 minutes ago
Comedian Rob Heeney on Twitter
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Very bizarre sight seeing thousands of happy people emerging from The Emirates. Turns out it was Muse playing, not Arsenal. That explains it
Updated 5 minutes ago
Comedian Lachlan Patterson on Twitter
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@London_Calling_ we all are in that movie brah
Updated 6 minutes ago
Comedian Adam Hunter on Twitter
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Sometimes you have to bang someone who is way below your standards to break your Dry Spell. It's a Tune-Up Lay.
Updated 6 minutes ago
Comedian Nicky Paris on Twitter
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No one knows how hard it is to be me. Every time I make a milkshake, 15,000 boys just show up in my yard.
Updated 6 minutes ago
Comedian Jay Hollingsworth on Twitter
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@RainingOnU thanks!
Updated 7 minutes ago
Comedian Jason Collings on Twitter
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Tonight!!! @TheIrvineImprov 8pm & 10pm!! Hit me up for free tix!
Updated 7 minutes ago
Comedian Jo Koy on Twitter
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Great list RT @ItsChrisWalker: 3 favorite people in the whole world 1. @50cent 2. @Jokoy 3. @TheRock And I don't care what anyone says
Updated 8 minutes ago
Comedian Kevin Pollak on Twitter
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What the...?! RT @KendraSchultz: Caught someone #redhanded gnawing on my @kevinpollak book #dogslikekevinpollaktoo http://t.co/bEp3ev89ly
What the...?! RT @KendraSchultz: Caught someone #redhanded gnawing on my @kevinpollak book #dogslikekevinpollaktoo http://t.co/bEp3ev89ly
Updated 9 minutes ago
Comedian Jo Koy on Twitter
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RT @BradWollack: “@Jokoy: @joshwolfcomedy I did that the day it happened ” Jo, you couldn't have donated half the money u JUST won.>shut up
Updated 9 minutes ago
Comedian Dan Monaghan on Twitter
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@danharmon The dog is better groomed.
Updated 9 minutes ago
Comedian Jason Collings on Twitter
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@andykozel hahahaha!!
Updated 9 minutes ago
Comedian Mitch English on Twitter
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RT @popnewsgirl: I find it interesting that @AmandaBynes only follows seven people - and one of them is Barack Obama. #foodforthought
Updated 9 minutes ago
Comedian Ricky Gervais on Twitter
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Respect to @DavidHayemaker, the toughest guy in the world. Any one who can go on TV in my nan's silver quilted house coat has no fear :)
Updated 10 minutes ago
Comedian Jason Collings on Twitter
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RT @FrankieTabbs: Saw and met comedian @jasoncollings this week. Funny guy. Looking forward to seeing him again!
Updated 10 minutes ago
Comedian Shawn Pelofsky on Twitter
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Soup Plantation is code for "Bulimic's Dream".
Updated 10 minutes ago
Comedian Paula Poundstone on Twitter
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The Santa Monica Dolphins rugby team played with heart in the State Championships today. Many are still alive.
Updated 12 minutes ago
Comedian Jamie Kennedy on Twitter
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@ChefDCNC thank you dumb dumb!
Updated 12 minutes ago
Comedian Erick Foster on Twitter
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Me and @sheryl404 after the Tank show. She was the opener and smashed it! Whats good @ajalexander2529 . http://t.co/dLkCSlcAN4
Me and @sheryl404  after the Tank show. She was the opener and smashed it!  Whats good @ajalexander2529 . http://t.co/dLkCSlcAN4
Updated 12 minutes ago
Comedian Greg Proops on Twitter
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I am now off the bridge. Kittens is breathing again. See you @BellHouseNY we are stardust.
Updated 12 minutes ago
Comedian Jamie Kennedy on Twitter
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@BriannaCCarey thanks yo!
Updated 13 minutes ago
Comedian Thai Rivera on Twitter
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@bryandey who you in sac with?
Updated 13 minutes ago
Comedian Jamie Kennedy on Twitter
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@tammynicholls thanks guuuurl
Updated 13 minutes ago

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