Following
92
92
Followers
216410
216410
Twitter Name: @DemetriMartin
Website: http://demetrimartin.com
Location: is here.
Description: This Is A Book by Demetri Martin is in stores.
Website: http://demetrimartin.com
Location: is here.
Description: This Is A Book by Demetri Martin is in stores.
Profile Link: http://comedytweet.com/Demetri_Martin
Piss! Ogre, vent. Never gossip. #exclamation #advice #palindrome
Updated 8 day(s) ago
These words go together.
Updated 13 day(s) ago
å___________¬a #HoldStill
Updated 14 day(s) ago
Still shaken from when I drove diagonally over a speed bump.
Updated 15 day(s) ago
A snake wearing a bunch of bracelets.
Updated 16 day(s) ago
A warm breeze blew across the deck as the slightly overweight gardener lost his balance and tumbled into the birdbath. #VeryShortStories
Updated 17 day(s) ago
Sometimes I just want to curl up with a good book, but not too tightly. #JustASlightCurl #PotentialBackPainAndDifficultyReadingIfTooCurled
Updated 21 day(s) ago
For some reason rocking chairs don't rock sideways.
Updated posted April 19, 2013, 10:12 am
A frog wearing a tiny tie.
Updated posted April 17, 2013, 8:25 am
Hi. I will be at SUBTERRANEAN BOOKS in St. Louis TODAY from 4 - 5 pm.
Updated posted April 15, 2013, 9:59 am
Hi. I will be at SUBTERRANEAN BOOKS in St. Louis TOMORROW from 4 - 5 pm. #OneDayLate
Updated posted April 14, 2013, 6:16 pm
ST LOUIS. I just realized my book signing was today. I thought it was tomorrow. I'm very sorry. I'll do the signing tomorrow at 4pm. #MeDumb
Updated posted April 14, 2013, 4:49 pm
Hello, ST LOUIS. I will be doing a show TOMORROW night at 8PM at THE PAGEANT. #AlmostDoneWithTour http://t.co/UPz3X6F7pM
Updated posted April 13, 2013, 4:14 pm
Placeholder
Updated posted April 12, 2013, 1:12 pm
Cotton candy is the perfect snack when I'm in the mood to eat dry, scratchy fabric.
Updated posted April 9, 2013, 8:23 am
#OnlyThis
Updated posted April 7, 2013, 10:26 am
Hey, LOS ANGELES.I'll be at Book Soup at 2pm TODAY with my new book POINT YOUR FACE AT THIS. #MaybeSeeYouThere
Updated posted April 6, 2013, 10:54 am
Hello, AUSTIN, TX. I will be at BOOK PEOPLE with my new book POINT YOUR FACE AT THIS at 3:30 pm TODAY. #StandingNearPodium
Updated posted April 4, 2013, 7:35 am
Hello, AUSTIN, TX. I will be at BOOK PEOPLE with my new book POINT YOUR FACE AT THIS at 3:30 pm TOMORROW. #ShoutingCertainWords
Updated posted April 3, 2013, 5:01 pm
Hello, GEORGIA, I will be at EAGLE EYE BOOKSHOP in Decatur with my new book POINT YOUR FACE AT THIS at 4pm TODAY. #MyFirstTimeInDecatur
Updated posted April 3, 2013, 6:07 am
Hi, ANN ARBOR I will be at Barnes & Noble on Washtenaw Ave with my new book POINT YOUR FACE AT THIS at 2pm TODAY. #SayingWashtenawToMyself
Updated posted April 2, 2013, 8:37 am
To any babies out there, I'm impressed that you can read this.
Updated posted April 1, 2013, 3:39 pm
Hello, CHICAGO. I will be at the DePaul Barnes & Noble with my new book POINT YOUR FACE AT THIS at 4pm TODAY. #SomeWordsAllCaps
Updated posted April 1, 2013, 12:04 pm
PORTLAND, Oregon. I will be at Powell's Books on Burnside TODAY at 2pm with my new book POINT YOUR FACE AT THIS. #Hey
Updated posted March 30, 2013, 11:12 am
There are propellor hats but no jet engine hats. #HeadFires
Updated posted March 30, 2013, 9:37 am
This is the bottom of the page....
