Gus Campos

Gus Campos on Xtreme Tweet
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Twitter Name: @GooseCampos
Website: http://tinyurl.com/29hz5n
Description: Forget everything you've heard about Malaysian pottery, trust me

Profile Link: http://comedytweet.com/Gus_Campos
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Comedian Gus Campos on Twitter
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I'll crank up Heart's 'What about Love' at a stop light in my convertible Mazda Miata dressed as Marilyn Monroe, that's how secure I am bro
Updated 7 day(s) ago
Comedian Gus Campos on Twitter
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Cue fun salsa music: "I'm cool, NOT a degenerate coke head pulling a lever all night" is how Indian casinos should advertise
Updated 8 day(s) ago
Comedian Gus Campos on Twitter
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"Life on four strings" was the highlight of the LA film festival; very touching and inspirational. Never use a low G? @JakeShimabukuro
Updated 8 day(s) ago
Comedian Gus Campos on Twitter
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Quick! listen to this before they give you a jaywalking ticket... http://t.co/pzZ9kUMIc6
Updated 10 day(s) ago
Comedian Gus Campos on Twitter
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If Quentin Tarantino taught us anything, every Harley Davidson owners basement should be searched http://t.co/kHVyo3yFBw
Updated 10 day(s) ago
Comedian Gus Campos on Twitter
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Anybody else shotgun nacho cheese from their nose watching Jimmy Kimmel finally doing @EliBraden's Supreme Court sour cream joke?
Updated 10 day(s) ago
Comedian Gus Campos on Twitter
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Shout out to Katt Williams for saving those kidnapped girls in Ohio!
Updated 13 day(s) ago
Comedian Gus Campos on Twitter
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Ever wake up in a Tijuana jail with two other mariachi chicks with beards and mustaches? I never did, next year
Updated 13 day(s) ago
Comedian Gus Campos on Twitter
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Is that tattoo on your shoulder your "O" face? @CharmaneStar
Updated 14 day(s) ago
Comedian Gus Campos on Twitter
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$$ Making Idea: 1. dress up like a slutty waitress 2. go for a motorcycle ride with that Geico dick dressed with dollar bills 3. Kill him $$
Updated 15 day(s) ago
Comedian Gus Campos on Twitter
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Who said every commercial has to start with some shitty song track? I'm not selling the fucking soundtrack to a Buick. #AdMan
Updated 15 day(s) ago
Comedian Gus Campos on Twitter
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@Shaq Never forget #NBAonTNT http://t.co/ziED6yVdgF
@Shaq Never forget #NBAonTNT http://t.co/ziED6yVdgF
Updated 15 day(s) ago
Comedian Gus Campos on Twitter
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I don't have AIDS but can't wait to get it, OR watch a Will/Jaden Smith film
Updated 15 day(s) ago
Comedian Gus Campos on Twitter
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I'm like the Indiana Jones of excavating my hamper for that lost condom
Updated 15 day(s) ago
Comedian Gus Campos on Twitter
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I'll write a fifty line haiku about the majesty of Dolphins peeing in the water UNDER the dotted line of a paycheck, like a real G
Updated 17 day(s) ago
Comedian Gus Campos on Twitter
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Someone should tell "The Rock" to chill off splatting his physique all over the place; Arby's has a new Hawaiin bun, you in shape dick
Updated 17 day(s) ago
Comedian Gus Campos on Twitter
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Pretty damn sure this jam is based on @PaulyPeligroso's tweets http://t.co/4o6NnJWQEE
Updated 17 day(s) ago
Comedian Gus Campos on Twitter
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"Homeless people have great hair and giant tits" is what I'm waiting for on CNN
Updated 17 day(s) ago
Comedian Gus Campos on Twitter
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Sitcom idea: TBS execs trying to roll a joint in their Volvo's thinking of something that's hood; Very Funny
Updated 17 day(s) ago
Comedian Gus Campos on Twitter
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RT @genepompa: Turns out the ol lady doesn't need a new vagina after all! Getting a rebuilt and saving a few bucks.
Updated 18 day(s) ago
Comedian Gus Campos on Twitter
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Million Dollar idea: Cologne scent of Derek Jeter's finger "Can I smell your finger?" "Smells like pussy!" (Derek Winks) "Exactly"
Updated 18 day(s) ago
Comedian Gus Campos on Twitter
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Don't believe if you say you're closed. I've got unlimited weekend minutes, I'll re-dial all night until you take my order @PizzaHut
Updated 21 day(s) ago
Comedian Gus Campos on Twitter
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Why? I don't get that RT @prodigalsam Raise your hand if you enjoy breakfast burritos. Now use that hand to punch yourself in the mouth.
Updated 23 day(s) ago
Comedian Gus Campos on Twitter
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Don't mean to brag, but I just turned this leftover dinner burrito into a breakfast burrito, like a wizard
Updated 24 day(s) ago
Comedian Gus Campos on Twitter
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Phö My Life @LeynaNguyenNews http://t.co/on6ngQckU5
Phö My Life @LeynaNguyenNews  http://t.co/on6ngQckU5
Updated 24 day(s) ago

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