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Twitter Name: @SeanCrespo
Website: http://about.me/seancrespo
Description: Mr. Crespo is a comedian and former sleep deprivation study participant.
Website: http://about.me/seancrespo
Description: Mr. Crespo is a comedian and former sleep deprivation study participant.
Profile Link: http://comedytweet.com/Sean_Crespo
Seth Meyers is too ethnic for my tastes. Whiter please, NBC!
Updated 7 day(s) ago
@joshgondelman That puck spent almost its entire time in the Leafs zone. Zero travel time.
Updated 8 day(s) ago
Fall is my favorite season. #bruins
Updated 8 day(s) ago
Bergeron. That's it. #bruins
Updated 8 day(s) ago
BREAKING NEWS: Glass Still Top Material To Break
Updated 8 day(s) ago
"Who parted?" - hair
Updated 8 day(s) ago
I'm so ugly my doppleganger is better looking than me. GOODNIGHT!
Updated 8 day(s) ago
PRO TIP: Dividing up your not-dead nana's possessions because she's in a home now is a great way to reconnect with the rest of your family.
Updated 9 day(s) ago
"Crushed it." - wine maker
Updated 9 day(s) ago
I don't care if you ARE a Newsie, pape jokes aren't funny.
Updated 11 day(s) ago
Saved a cat today. Hardest part was the baptism. Cats REALLY do not like water even if it's guaranteeing them a spot in heaven.
Updated 12 day(s) ago
RT @TheFearBoners: I'm watching the Jodi Arias verdict because, as an attractive person, I need to know if brutal murder is something I cou…
Updated 13 day(s) ago
DILDO IN YOUR FACE
There's no emoji for that so I had to type out the sentiment for my wife.
#class
Updated 13 day(s) ago
I call my dick The Punisher because it too is a disappointment. And because it's shaped like Dolph Lundgren.
Updated 13 day(s) ago
I'm already rehearsing! RT @script_leaks: Sides are up for the new movie "SEXY IS THE NIGHT (sponsored by Sbarro)!" http://t.co/kUu4BuyhHM
Updated 13 day(s) ago
How is the "Crespo" not a unit of measurement yet? EX: "The average gamer's musculature experiences roughly 500 Crespos of atrophy daily."
Updated 14 day(s) ago
RSVP for LASERS IN THE JUNGLE, Thursday at 730 pm @UCBTheatreEast & click the link to see our guests this week: http://t.co/ZBVk3P6VQg
Updated 14 day(s) ago
Pro Health Tip: Add fresh Burberries to your next breakfast shake. Nothing keeps you regular like plaid flavored fruit!
Updated 15 day(s) ago
I think I have this self-sabotage thing down solid, but I'm sure I'll mess it up soon enough.
Updated 15 day(s) ago
Happy Cinqo De whythefuckamIawakethisearly.
Updated 16 day(s) ago
Had a nightmare that my only writing credit was Facebook.
Updated 17 day(s) ago
@LITJcomedy welcomes @ChristFinnegan @leopoldallen @seanytime + special guest tonight at 7:30 PM. $5. http://t.co/ZBVk3P6VQg
Updated 19 day(s) ago
RT @erinjudge: Hooray! We now trust people with contraception that we were gonna force to trust with babies instead! #America
Updated 20 day(s) ago
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