Following
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597358
Twitter Name: @badbanana
Website: http://about.me/timsiedell
Location: Nebraska, USA
Description: Sometimes I just want to give it all up and become a handsome billionaire.
Website: http://about.me/timsiedell
Location: Nebraska, USA
Description: Sometimes I just want to give it all up and become a handsome billionaire.
Profile Link: http://comedytweet.com/Tim_Siedell
My newest million dollar idea involves crowdsourcing. So, who has a million dollar idea for me?
Updated 10 day(s) ago
Serious tweet: creeping, inevitable death.
Updated 10 day(s) ago
RT @neatorama: "And to my son Ronald, I leave my entire collection of mint-condition, never-been-opened ..." http://t.co/9FUjDViAS1 @badban…
Updated 11 day(s) ago
The next logical step is to have someone make a Life On Mars video while on a one-way mission to Mars. I nominate Coldplay.
Updated 11 day(s) ago
Just achieved total enlightenment and, to be honest, it wasn't worth the extra effort. I give it three stars out of five.
Updated 13 day(s) ago
Now that I'm at 666,666 followers, I can finally reveal my true identity and motive. I'm a mommyblogger here to sell you cookware.
Updated 14 day(s) ago
Working remotely from home today because it's a million times easier to sleep when co-workers aren't around.
Updated 14 day(s) ago
Happy birthday, Bono. I was hoping to give you a gift today but I still haven't found what I'm looking for (Snoopy tie).
Updated 14 day(s) ago
RT @Mike_Bianchi: @badbanana like a bridge over horrific slaughter / I evade the clowns
Updated 15 day(s) ago
Think how much more powerful the song would have been if it had been called "Bridge Over Razor-Toothed Circus Clowns."
Updated 15 day(s) ago
Million dollar idea: Invest $995,000 in a bank CD.
Updated 15 day(s) ago
The tiny umbrella in a cocktail makes no sense. A drink is already wet.
Updated 15 day(s) ago
Take your stinking paws off my phone you damned dirty app.
Updated 15 day(s) ago
The "draw this cartoon turtle" people should have made each drawing test slightly different. They'd have a free animated movie by now.
Updated 16 day(s) ago
In retrospect, Jodi Arias and her team should have blamed the murder on an uprising caused by an inflammatory YouTube video.
Updated 16 day(s) ago
My Iron Man 4 pitch: Tony Stark just goes around the world slapping those stupid Google glasses off everyone.
Updated 16 day(s) ago
Don't forget to stick around after the credits to see which Great Gatsby character gets recruited into S.H.I.E.L.D.
Updated 17 day(s) ago
Instead of cigarettes, carrot sticks! Just one of my many ideas on how to make Mad Men more kid-friendly.
Updated 18 day(s) ago
I liked that part in Iron Man 3 where there was an explosion.
Updated 20 day(s) ago
Iron Man 3 is even more fun if you pretend Ben Kingsley's character is a fed up Gandhi.
Updated 21 day(s) ago
"Just Do It" - Also a great slogan for a doctor who performs gastric bypass surgery.
Updated 22 day(s) ago
Only U2 can prevent unforgettable fires.
Updated 22 day(s) ago
The only way I could hate this weather more is if a bunch of New York Yankees started falling from the sky.
Updated 23 day(s) ago
Quick question. Can I just drop and roll? Or do I really have to stop? Because this is pretty exciting and I'd like to keep tweeting.
Updated 23 day(s) ago
This is the bottom of the page....
